Orange Angel Wing Heart

9 DECEMBER, 2021
today i went to the mall got two nightgowns and a caramel ice cream that dripped all over my face and hands. im upset today because it feels like all my emotions are boiling over i also feel fat and ugly i think my eating stuff is coming back. i miss yesterday, i miss my boyfriend and his cat. at least there's no more school left. im very stressed and sad. i listen to lana a lot more recenetly it reminds me of an old close friend who i miss. i hope shes OK out there. im making pasta right now.

8 DECEMBER, 2021
sorry for not writing friends. a lot of stuff has happened. i ususally spend the day with my boyfriend or out and when i get back late i never have energy to get on here. it makes me sad. it's december my favorite month beside june. my birthday is on the 16th, i turn 15. 15 is boring i was i was 18 already. im so tired of living here. it was my boyfriends birthday today, he turned 16, i spend the day with him gave him presents and ate cake. we had subway too but his cat tried to steal it. his cool grandpa came over too he rides motorcycles and has been to canada. my grandma passed away today. im glad shes no longer in pain. we have to go to queensland soon, to be with family, im sad we didnt get to see her before she died. i was dehdryarted a couple days ago and my temp reached almost 40 c! crazyyy. we went to a shady doctor. i watched home alone. i hope i get lots of presents for my birthday, i never usually. just a book or something. i wish i had a cat of my own. i wish i had family i liked. im really sad sometimes, but also really happy and angry and empty. i got this rod birth control thing in yesterday, they put a numbing needle in my arm and then inserted a small wooden thing into my arm. it's weird thinking that some thing is in my arm. but i cant feel it it didn't hurt. my boyfriend bought me a slushie at 7/11 for being a brave girl! it was pink raspberry i think and i got a bubblegum ice cream. it was a good day but im so stressed a lot of the time we fight a lot i want someone to want me. maybe im shallow. maybe i just want someone to love me. angel is pathetic. goodbye.